


Crowley is tempted

by Santillatron



Series: Lead us both into temptation [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Aziraphale is a bastard but Crowley loves it, Aziraphale is fed up of waiting, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Mild Smut, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Temptation, Write your own happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-10-01 23:34:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20437526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Santillatron/pseuds/Santillatron
Summary: Aziraphale thought him finally choosing Crowley would mean things might move along a bit. When things don't he takes matters into his own hands.ORAziraphale learns a new fact about snakes, and uses it to his advantage.





	1. Crowley

**Author's Note:**

> I read a fic about less-naive-than-he-appears Aziraphale redecorating his bookshop as an excuse to knowingly fluster Crowley (which I of course cannot now find, so if anyone does, please let me know so I can credit properly) and thought it sounded fun.
> 
> I also remembered an interesting thing about snakes, and well here we are. The two chapters are their own perspectives of the same event. 
> 
> Mostly I just needed this out of my head, so it's not perfect but I hope you like the idea.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crowley never lets Aziraphale see him as a snake, for one very good reason.

“Crowley! Where in Heaven’s name are you? I can barely hear you!”

“Nowhere in Heaven’s name Angel, but in general terms I’m in Harrod’s.”

“Good lord, why? And why is your signal so bad?”

Crowley rolled his eyes. His idea to block mobile phone signal in department stores was backfiring again. 

“The usual, winding up the staff. They have them so well trained, it’s a nice challenge. Want me to pick you up anything on my way over?” Crowley pictured Aziraphale’s face as he contemplated the vast array of culinary delights available at the prestigious department store. It took a while. 

“Well if you’re going to tempt me o foul fiend, you might as well get me some of those delightful chocolates. And what makes you think I was going to invite you over?” Aziraphale sounded slightly put out that Crowley had guessed the purpose of the call. 

“I don’t have to come if you don’t want. I’m sure I spotted a new person in the luggage department that hasn’t had the pleasure of my custom yet.”

“Oh, no, please come. I’ve got something that I wanted to show you.”

Well, thought Crowley as he sauntered off to the patisserie, contemplating the many things he would like for Aziraphale to want to show him, now who’s doing the tempting? 

When Crowley arrived with his box of Harrod’s finest cocoa based selection under his arm, Aziraphale ushered him in. He took the box with a delighted smile and placed it on a tray already set with tea and a coffee for Crowley. 

“I thought we could go upstairs, I’ve made a few adjustments to the roof that I wanted to show you” He said as he bustled off. 

Crowley just raised an eyebrow and loped after him. He’d never been up to the roof of the bookshop before. This should be good. 

Aziraphale had certainly been hard at work. Crowley took his sunglasses off to really take in the spectacle in front of him. The angel had transformed the roof into a roof garden. But not just any garden, it was their garden. The garden of Eden. Well, all the important bits anyway. The apple tree was front and centre, complete with the branch that Crowley used to drape himself over. All the plants and flowers looked fresh and new and inviting. To one side stood a very anxious looking angel, with two chairs and a table on which he had placed the tray. 

“What do you think? I put in as much as I could remember. It’s shielded from the street so nobody can see us. I hope I got your branch right, I added it in case you wanted to bask again like you used to. I know it’s been a while since you took your serpent form, and I know you don’t like doing it around me, but it’s there if you want it. Please say something?”

Crowley walked around touching everything as if testing it was real. The plants did their best not to flinch at his touch but, word spreads, even in plants and they had heard what Crowley could do. As he got to the tree he inspected the branch carefully. He knew it would be perfect, but he couldn’t let Aziraphale just have the satisfaction straight away. He turned to deliver his verdict. 

“It’s, oh, er...” Aziraphale had removed his coat and was casually sat by the table watching him. The angel’s relaxed appearance caught the demon off guard. Aziraphale had an odd glint in his eye that Crowley was finding rather distracting. 

“Well it’s ok I guess. The branch looks about right.”

“You don’t like it?” Aziraphale stopped rolling up his sleeve and looked at the demon, his brow furrowed almost imperceptibly. 

“No, I didn’t say that. Actually I love it.” He said, gazing at the angel who was gradually becoming more and more... undone. The admission just slipped out and he hoped it wasn’t too obvious.

“Oh good!” Replied the angel, beaming. “I thought we needed somewhere where we could just be for a bit. Try the branch! Nobody can see you transform here.”

“Aziraphale you know I don’t like using my snake form in front of you. Snake brains are rather... primitive. It’s embarrassing.”

“I know you better than to judge you Crowley.”

There were other reasons that Crowley avoided being a snake around Aziraphale, but he wasn’t about to mention the fact that snakes don’t really understand willpower, and that he was using a lot of that around Aziraphale most of the time. More so at the moment with the angel looking quite so at ease. It certainly wasn’t easy. But the tree should be far enough away, and it had been so long since he properly stretched out. It was worth a chance he thought. What’s the worst that could happen? He dropped down, relishing the feeling of freedom, slithered over to the tree and up to the branch. The tree had heard the rumours, but knew it was too big for the demon to cart off without the angel stopping him so it was content to let him bask. Crowley looped his body over the branch, red underside gleaming, rested his head amongst the leaves and relaxed as only a snake can. He was better at sitting still in this form, but even so, the tip of his tail meandered about as he mused upon the angel’s rolled up sleeves. 

He heard the tell-tale chime of a miracle, and chuckled to himself. The angel just couldn’t resist. Probably reheating his tea or something. He opened one yellow, slitted eye just a fraction to see if his suspicion was correct. 

The angel had moved. He was closer to the tree and had used his miracle to change one of the seats into a sun lounger, which he was currently lining up to the best garden view. Crowley’s snake brain was simple, but it was very good at tracking movement. He saw the angel’s body glowing with heat in the infra-red spectrum, and realised he was taking off his tie and waistcoat. The serpent raised his head to watch the angel fussing. 

“Oh sorry, didn’t mean to disturb you!” Aziraphale said gently. “You just looked so comfortable I thought I’d join you. Can snakes eat chocolate?”

Crowley resolutely hid his head back amongst the leaves at the thought of Aziraphale joining him on the branch. By chance there was a small gap he could peer through, with a perfect sight line to the lounger. 

Another rustle. The eye opened the tiniest amount at the sound of more movement. The Angel couldn’t have much more in the way of clothing to remove. 

Oh Lord. He was reclined on the sun lounger, shirt undone at the top, hands clasped behind his head. As Crowley watched the angel reached out and carefully selected a chocolate from the box. He popped it into his mouth, licking his fingers slowly in the process. It was clear he was enjoying the decadent treat, from the small but appropriately rapturous smile on his face, and his apparent desire to devour every last trace of chocolate from his fingers. He looked beautiful, and relaxed, and oh god. 

Crowley shut his eyes tight. His snake brain couldn’t cope with this. His department was creating the temptations, not resisting them. He knew this had been a bad idea. In a moment of distraction he reflexively flickered his tongue out, tasting the surrounding air as he tried to work out what to do, remembering too late why he had been avoiding that. 

Pheromones. Snakes can smell pheromones. And there’s very little they can do about their response when they do. 

As if in a trance, he slowly slithered back down the tree, constantly tasting the air, following the intoxicating scent. He moved with purpose across the grass, and over to the sun lounger. The serpent of Eden was a large snake, and the lounger creaked as he added his weight to its load. Crowley slowly slid upwards, brushing against the existing occupant’s leg, towards the warmth and towards the source of those irresistible pheromones. 

The scent got stronger as Crowley slipped up over Aziraphale’s hips, across his waist and up to his chest. He felt the angel’s heart start racing as he found a gap in his shirt and slid inside. He needed to be as close as possible to the pheromone source. The shirt buttons popped open as the serpent body squeezed inside. His tail curled down past Aziraphale’s hip, brushing against his buttock, forcing its way under his thigh and finally curling back up and over his crotch. His long body writhed on the angel’s stomach and chest, while his head slipped up and around the angel’s neck, tongue flicking, tasting everywhere he went. The angel’s breathing was deep and slow, but his pounding heart was giving him away. He reached one hand down and lightly stroked his fingers along the snake’s back. Crowley moved his head up and his tongue flicked behind Aziraphale’s ear. 

“I never expected snake kisses to tickle.” He giggled. 

At the sound of his voice, Crowley snapped his head up, wide eyes looking at a smirking angelic face in alarm. The spell was broken and Crowley realised where he was, and what he was doing. He panicked and morphed back to his human form, one leg entwined with Aziraphale’s, the other up over his hip. He had one hand on Aziraphale’s bare chest, and the other wrapped around his neck. Their bodies were firmly pressed together. 

“I’m so sorry!” He spluttered and tried to extricate himself. “I told you my snake form was stupid.” But Aziraphale had one hand on his back, firmly holding him in place. He’d forgotten how strong the angel was. 

“I’d say it was rather smart, actually.” He grinned, pulling the demon closer. 

“You utter bastard.” Crowley murmured affectionately as he realised he’d been well and truly had. The angel had won this round but he didn’t care. It was worth it he thought as he melted into the angel’s embrace.


	2. Aziraphale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aziraphale knows exactly what he is doing, thank you very much.

Aziraphale was bored. He’d realised he actually quite enjoyed the errands that Crowley sent him on, and he missed the thrill. He was also irritated that despite making it fairly clear (at least that’s what he thought) that he’d finally made his choice between heaven and Crowley, Crowley didn’t seen to have taken the hint. Or he was making the angel wait, as Crowley had been made to wait for him. Well, Aziraphale wasn’t much good at waiting when he wanted something. So he decided to have some fun with the demon. The idea came to him when he learnt a new fact about snakes. Now he just had to find a way to get Crowley to change into his snake form. 

So he began the garden. The last place Crowley had been a snake that Aziraphale knew of. Hopefully it had as many happy memories for both demon and angel as he thought. He carefully crafted the apple tree to include the serpent’s branch. He’d spent quite a long time watching that branch so he had a fairly good memory of it. 

Then he set about making the rest of his roof as beautiful as he could. He even included a few of the plants that Crowley had given him to cure. Strangely the rest of the plants suddenly became wonderfully lush when those went in. Maybe he’d overdone the healing on them... 

The next thing he had to do was just get the demon over. So he did what he always did, and called him. 

“Hello? Hello? Aziraphale is that you?”

“Crowley! Where in Heaven’s name are you? I can barely hear you!”

“Nowhere in Heaven’s name Angel, but in general terms I’m in Harrod’s.”

“Good lord, why? And why is your signal so bad?”

“The usual, winding up the staff. They have them so well trained, it’s a nice challenge. Want me to pick you up anything on my way over?”

Bother, he had sussed him out already. Oh well. Aziraphale contemplated the food court at Harrod’s. It was simply divine. It took quite some time to come to a decision. 

“Well if you’re going to tempt me o foul fiend, you might as well get me some of those delightful chocolates. And what makes you think I was going to invite you over?” He hoped his little game wasn’t over before it started. 

“I don’t have to come if you don’t want. I’m sure I spotted a new person in the luggage department that hasn’t had the pleasure of my custom yet.” 

“Oh, no, please come. I’ve got something that I wanted to show you.” 

Aziraphale heard Crowley arrive and let himself in. They never bothered knocking, and no lock was able to stop them. He turned to greet the demon, appreciating the way he sauntered in with the chocolate selection under his arm. The scent was simply delicious. The chocolates didn’t smell too bad either. He had tea and coffee waiting, and before Crowley, or he, could get distracted, took him straight up to his roof garden. He was rather proud of it, but really hoped he hadn’t overdone it. Crowley had stopped in the doorway and removed his sunglasses, revealing his striking eyes that seemed to glow in the sunshine. 

“What do you think? I put in as much as I could remember. It’s shielded from the street so nobody can see us. I hope I got your branch right, I added it in case you wanted to bask again like you used to. I know it’s been a while since you took your serpent form, and I know you don’t like doing it around me, but it’s there if you want it. Please say something?”

Crowley walked around touching everything. Aziraphale was so distracted by watching the way Crowley moved that he failed to notice the plants’ reaction. He quickly took off his coat and sat down as nonchalantly as he could. His posture hid his nerves and excitement. 

“It’s, oh, er...”

Aziraphale stifled a giggle at seeing the demon so flustered at his appearance. He began to roll up his sleeves to see what reaction that got. 

“Well it’s ok I guess. The branch looks about right.” Ha. Aziraphale had known Crowley for long enough to know the demon was trying not to give in too easily. 

“You don’t like it?” Aziraphale asked. He furrowed his brow ever so slightly. He knew Crowley couldn’t say no to that face. This was fun. 

“No, I didn’t say that. Actually I love it.” Crowley said, without breaking eye contact. Aziraphale lingered on that one for a moment. Almost an admission... 

“Oh good!” He replied, beaming. “I thought we needed somewhere where we could just be for a bit. Try the branch! Nobody can see you transform here.” Go on, Aziraphale thought, enjoying himself immensely. He could see that having his sleeves rolled up was distracting the demon. 

“Aziraphale you know I don’t like using my snake form in front of you. Snake brains are rather... primitive. It’s embarrassing.”

“I know you better than to judge you Crowley.” He said as calmly as he could. 

Got him. As Aziraphale busied himself with pouring tea, Crowley gave in, dropping down to his snake form and made his way to the branch. 

Aziraphale waited until the snake was settled. Oh how he’d watched that snake with fascination all those millennia ago. Observed the glossy black scales, with that striking red belly. He was nearly lost in thought himself before he remembered his plan. 

Right, miracle a chair into a lounger, and get as close as possible. He knew Crowley would hear the miracle being performed and be curious. He discretely made sure the snake was watching before he casually removed his bow tie and waistcoat. As Crowley’s head popped up he knew it was working. 

“Oh sorry, didn’t mean to disturb you!” He said as gently as he could. “You just looked so comfortable I thought I’d join you. Can snakes eat chocolate?”

The head shot back down and buried itself in the leaves. But Aziraphale has made this branch. And knew that he’d left a gap in the leaves that would just about let the occupant see the spot Aziraphale had chosen. 

He was feeling decidedly smug. He undid enough shirt buttons to entice without seeming obvious, and lay back. Hands behind head should do it. He rustled the chocolates just enough to attract attention, as he didn’t want his next performance to be missed. 

The way the snake was gripping the branch, and the thrashing tail, told him it was time for the pièce de résistance. 

He lay back, tasting the divine chocolate and thought of Crowley. Thought about how much he adored the demon. He let the feeling of love fill his soul until it was ready to burst. 

Pheromones. Aziraphale has learnt that snakes can smell pheromones. And they cannot help themselves but scramble to the source. Then Aziraphale had discovered that pheromones were something that human bodies produced when they felt love and attraction. Chocolate aided this. 

Well that certainly explained why Crowley would never let the angel see him as a snake. 

And so the plan was hatched. And as Aziraphale felt Crowley slide his serpentine body up the angel’s leg, he reflected on just how well it had worked. 

The angel tried his best to contain himself as Crowley moved his body over the angel’s chest. He forced his breathing to remain even, even though he knew his heart rate would be showing just how exhilarated he was. It was exquisite to feel the demon’s body writhing against his, the snake form adding a thrilling element, and he’d had to bite his lip when Crowley burst the buttons on his shirt. Oh how he had longed for this. He couldn’t let himself acknowledge the longing for so long, but when he chose Crowley over Heaven he’d felt the caged desire burst forth. It was better than he’d hoped. Crowley was clearly feeling the attraction just as Aziraphale felt it, and yet the beast that was strong enough to crush him was so tender. He’d had a little rush as Crowley had simultaneously wound his head around Aziraphale’s neck, and then gripped his leg with his tail. The little tiny snake kisses just fluttering around his neck and chest. He speculated if the snake knew where he was touching the angel’s body, the effect it was having, and realised the uncertainty was fuelling the fire of his excitement. He daren’t move in case the spell broke. 

He composed himself enough to reach down with one hand and feel the smooth scales, the muscles contracting in waves underneath. 

Just then Crowley flicked him behind the ear and a giggle escaped. Aziraphale was giddy with ecstasy. 

“I never expected snake kisses to tickle.” He managed to gasp out. 

The spell was broken and Crowley’s head shot up to look the angel in the face. Snakes aren’t capable of expressions, but it conveyed a certain amount of horror and embarrassment. Aziraphale was delighted when Crowley panicked and returned to his human form. The snake was scintillating, but this is how he loved his demon. And he loved him even more now their bodies were tangled together in the garden. He kept a hand on Crowley’s back where he’d been caressing him as a snake. 

I’m so sorry!” Crowley spluttered and tried to extricate himself. “I told you my snake form was stupid.” Aziraphale had half expected this, and held his hand firm. He wasn’t going to let him wiggle his way out of this one. 

“I’d say it was rather smart, actually.” He grinned, pulling the demon closer. 

“You utter bastard.” Crowley murmured affectionately as he melted into the angel’s embrace. 

Just enough of a bastard thank you, thought the angel. For now.


End file.
